Find the best way to handle seeing your ex dating someone else to the point where it has no effect on you. These tips will help you quickly get over the pain of your ex boyfriend or girlfriend.
You may have suspected it for some time, but today you have seen it with your own eyes and you have not been able to deny reality any longer. Your ex is with another person and you feel in a state of total confusion.
No matter whether you are a boy or a girl, in both cases the sensation is common, and terribly painful if you have not been able to turn page yet. How to face the moment you find out that your ex is with someone else? Here are some tips to handle seeing your ex dating someone else which will guide you to move ahead and cope up with the situation.
REMEMBER THE REASONS FOR YOUR BREAKUP
A breakup is always painful, but if you made the decision to go through different paths it is because you thought that together you had no future. Behind each breakup is a series of reasons that propitiated it. This is the first thing you should keep in mind when you are pained to check that your ex is with another person. What reasons led you to finish? Has anything really changed since then? If the answer is no, at least it will be consoling to know that no matter how hard you try to recover yours, you know deep down that you would not get anywhere. Also, instead of feeling the pain or getting jealous, you should be happy that such a person is not in your life.
IT MAYBE AN EGO PROBLEM
If your life is running normally, why does it affect you that your ex is with someone else? There are many cases in which this feeling of pain does not contain a true feeling that remains, but only a wounded ego. We all love the idea of imagining that our ex regrets leaving us day and night, and compares us with everyone. In these comparisons we want to be winners, and in short, you want to have left an indelible mark on the life of your ex.
Sadly, it is not true and like any other human being, your ex continues with his/her life and may have found someone. Painful? Of course, but once you realize that it is your ego and not your heart that is suffering, it will all be much easier to bear. The faster you realize the reality, the easier it will be handle seeing your ex boyfriend or girlfriend dating someone else.
DO NOT PLAY DETECTIVES
The first idea that comes to mind is that we want to know who that person is and what your ex-partner may have seen in him/her. With social networks it is quite easy to find out almost everything about a person, so the temptation to make a false profile on Facebook and browsing will be very strong.
Forget this. The more you search about that relationship, the more it is going to hurt you, so it is best that you remain in ignorance. If you still have your ex among your virtual friends, it is the right time to block your profile and stop having news of him/her. Unless you really are a masochist and you like to suffer, do not play detectives, because this will make your heart break pain much more intense.
NEVER THINK OF HURTING ANYONE
The thoughts about your ex will come to your mind, it is inevitable. From the moment you find out that your ex is with someone, you begin to imagine situations that are unbearably painful. The thought of being single and your ex already dating puts you on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Never do anything to harm yourself or your ex and if such ideas are coming to your mind then talk to your friend or take professional help.
At first, it is normal for these thoughts to appear, because you need to assimilate the new situation, and to some extent, could be said to be beneficial because they give you a bath of reality. But there is no need to be martyred again and again bringing them to your head. So, do yourself a favor and when you find yourself having such images in your mind, force yourself to change the chip and think of something else.
KEEP YOUR MIND BUSY
The truth is that however much you want to control those thoughts, they usually return more often than you would like. The best solution is to keep your mind occupied, and for this you have to start new activities and relationships. The best antidote to the past is to look to the future, so try to make your social life more active and try to meet new people. It is also a good idea to start a course or project you had in mind for some time. Do anything that shifts the focus of attention to the future, instead of returning to what will not return. This is a good strategy that will help you handle seeing your ex dating someone else and will help minimize suffering.
START THINKING POSITIVE
After a period of breakup and with your head set on new illusions, it is time to rewrite this chapter and start giving it a different orientation. Now that the pain is a little less intense you can begin to rationalize what happened without you seem to be lying to comfort.
It is time to think that what has happened is for the good, because now that you are aware that this story has no turning back, you can start to focus on the many possibilities that open in front of you. It is the occasion to convince you that if that person took so little time to forget you, it is because your ex never meant anything serious about you. Thus, you have won because if you it was the end of suffering and find someone who loves you.
In short, you need to begin to change the interpretation of what happened, and live it as a fortunate fact rather than a misfortune. This will be the definitive moment when your suffering will begin to fall behind and you will be able to handle seeing your ex dating someone else easily.
NEVER RUSH TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP
So far you have done well, and you have managed to feel much better than at first, but you run the risk of wanting to rush events. Looking for a new partner ahead of time can have a counterproductive effect. This is because, although the saying that “a nail removes another nail” may be true sometimes, there is also the danger that soon after starting with a new person you begin to make comparisons. If that happens, all your effort will have been of no use. You may find yourself in a worse situation than the beginning, thinking that your ex is happy, and becoming aware that you are not with that new person. So, take it easy and do not start anything serious if you do not think you have totally overcome the situation.