Do you feel awkward to talk to a stranger? Find the best tips to confidently start a conversation with a guy you like, hold it for long and impress him.
Everyone thinks that it’s easy for women to get the guy all they have to do is “One look, One Smile and he is nearly on the hook”. In reality only the girls know how difficult it is to start a conversation with a guy who is some stranger, especially when they think the guy is cute and want him to like them. Sure it is difficult for guys to start a conversation with an attractive girl, but consider this when a guy is shot down by a beautiful girl everyone say “Hey, at least you gave it a shot. It’s her loss” but now imagine this what if the girl tries to start a conversation with a guy and is shot down? What do you think about that?
And now if you are afraid or you get really nervous when some cute guy is sitting next to you and you just want to act natural and start a casual conversation with the guy then you are in the right place. Here we will explain how to start a conversation with a guy starting from how to control yourself, how to continue that conversation and then transforming it into something more.
POWER OF THINKING
Our mind is a tricky thing it can make us believe anything it wants and so when we see a cute guy and our mind is scared of rejection. It tricks us into thinking that this guy is some kind of celebrity kind, but in reality he is just a normal guy. Our mind has placed high on pedestals, so we don’t even think about going there because as soon as we do, the fear and anxiety all comes rushing down. Then we don’t start a conversation with the guy because of so many reasons that our mind has made up but in essence there was only one which is self doubt.
If you notice carefully you will see that we have given this point’s header as Power of Thinking and not power of positive thinking. This is because negative thinking has too much hold over our mind and body and in order for positive thinking to take place we need to trick our mind into thinking something else. Taken an example from the famous Oscar winning movie, “Good Will Hunting” as Robin Williams says that “You’re not perfect, sport. And let me save you the suspense. This girl you met, she isn’t perfect either. But the question is whether or not you’re perfect for each other.
That’s the whole deal – that’s what intimacy is all about.” You see no one in this world is absolutely perfect and if you think that someone is, than that, being perfect in itself, is their biggest flaw because it leaves them lonely in this imperfect world. Now coming back to the topic, you know that he is not perfect like you imagined, so now think about that and re-frame this scenario. Now you could be more comfortable with yourself before you start talking to him.
The one thing that you need to start a conversation with anyone, let it be some celeb, is inner confidence because it helps you to get rid of self doubt and the basic trick is to think like “This guy is not perfect, he farts, he drinks, he burps” so what if he doesn’t like you and remember you are the prize not him and if he didn’t win then someone else will get the chance. So, anytime you see a guy you like and your mind puts him on that pedestals use this power of thinking trick of “He farts, he burps” and soon you will notice yourself smiling and ready to start a conversation with a guy.
Conversation Starters are like those cheesy lines in the movies and books but a tad bit more subtle just to get him started. These starters can be derived from anything like picking up on a surreal situation and commenting on it for him to back talk at you and then smile and take it from there. Even the most confident person needs these conversation starters initially to build up to its natural persona. After a while, it becomes your second nature to start a conversation on the go with anyone of your choice.
Some of the great conversations are started based on the cheesy lines like from Friends Joey’s line “How you doing?” when done in the right way always get you started on a nice conversation. If you have just built up your inner confidence and are starting to try out being the first one to start the conversation then you may like to use these conversation starters as it sought of eases your way into a conversation.
Some of the ways of starting a conversation is to use a situational conversational starters like using weather to your advantage like say you didn’t brought your umbrella and it’s raining outside then you can start by saying “Don’t you just hate it when that happens”. Also you can try this, if you or he does have an umbrella then you can ask or offer to share the umbrella, but for this to work every time you are going to need a lot of rain.
On the other hand if you want to start a conversation with a guy the best way is to ask him for a favor like “Holding your bag while you pay the bill” or like “watching your sit while you are away” or anything small. Guys always like to feel useful whether they are or not is entirely another matter. The best but a bit obvious kind of way is to spill your drink all over him and make him notice you, but please when you use this trick try not to spill a hot drink on him and especially not on his private parts because that would kind of ruin the mood don’t you think?
Conversation starters can only help you get so far, but from here on you have to carry yourself. Try to achieve your goal of this endeavor. You see first you have to build your inner confidence, then you have to take a shot at starting a conversation. However, when you have started an actual conversation it involves talking to the other person for a while without hesitation or fear of being coming out as dumb or worse. The best way to continue a conversation without fear is to talk to him like you would with any of your guy friends and make him feel comfortable around you.
As for topics to talk about and that is the best thing because you just met a complete stranger so you could talk about anything you want. Try to avoid topics involving your ex-boyfriends or any of your previous relationship and you should also try avoiding sex related topics unless and until you are looking for a one night stand. Try to be flirty and leave some hints like casually touching his hand and complementing him. Subtle things like these would let him know what your intentions are, but if you are just starting out in this conversation game then I would advise you not to go for the sexual one.
And whenever you are talking, there would be multiple topics originating from one single thing and you would be confused at times but there is no shame in it. Just laugh it off when that happens because guys love a girl who can laugh it off on her mistakes.
LEAVE ON A GOOD NOTE
Sometimes when you are talking on and on with some cute stranger you both forget that you were at that place for some reason. Then suddenly you realize you are getting late or you could just use this as a go to reason to get away from the guy. But remember if you like the guy and the conversation has been good so far which means he is not leaving until you are, but he has not exchanged information or hinted towards some future arrangement like a date or drinks or something of sought then you could cold read the situation.
If you think he wouldn’t mind then you may just leave your information like say “Call me if you ever want to hangout or go out for a drinks or something” and leave your number with him whether on a tissue paper or his hand and then leave. Never continue talking after you have given your digits to some guy because you always want to leave on a good note, so there is a greater possibility that he might call back.
This part is just to tell you that you’re not the only one who feels shy or have fear of starting a conversation with strangers. There are lots of people like us out there even the guy you think is cocky is also scared to be shut down. The only difference is that he got good at hiding his insecurity or his fear with his cockiness and you didn’t. So what if you mess up a couple of times, always remember “Failure is the first step towards Success.”
And lastly if you are talking to some guy and you feel like you have messed up then you can do one of two things. You can either make a joke out of it or you can just ignore it because it will only be awkward. So what, shit happens, you can either move on or you can get stuck” and believe me it’s better to get back up and move on because life is too small to waste it regretting on some stupid mistake that you are probably going to laugh at after sometime.
In the end all we would like to say is just breathe and remember he is not perfect either “He farts, he burps” and “You’re the prize” and may the best man win.